IF this is all I do all day, I should probably quit my day job. But never-the-less, I kind of LOVE that Groupon has a Miss Manners type section, and below is today’s “Guide To” and I felt that with my horrible potty mouth, I could try one of two of these today and see how they pan out with the common man.
The Groupon Guide to: Not Cursing
“A mouth that’s clean is safe around teens, but a mouth that swears is best reserved for empty chairs,” said noted politeness guru Ann Landers. Keep your mouth and mind clean with these exclamatory phrases that provide an alternative to swearwords:
• Oh my biscuits!
• What in the hairdresser’s wet jar of tools is going on in here?!
• Sweet mother of hate!
• For the love of kisses, will you kids cut it out?!
• Holy soldiers of the underworld!
• Whoopsie poopsie!
• Stick it up your pneumatic tube!
• Gosh nosh it!
• Aw, Starbucks!
• Good sky-monster almighty!
• You can go to Florida, you disheartening grandfather!