R.A.G.E. Against the Human Race


Even though this for me has definitely been an irritating issue for a long while, it’s probably been exacerbated lately for two reasons: 1) with Roy out for the count, I am the driver, which means I drive in general a LOT more, 2) I work in Berkeley…with a lot of…”certain kinds”…of people.

Let’s discuss the first as it’s an easier one to manage. I HATE DRIVERS!! I hate, hate, hate this sense of self entitlement that seems is running rampant across our freeways, highways, side roads, and neighborhood avenues. Just because you may be one of the masses who actually pay your taxes, get your car smogged, have up-to-date registration, and a niiiiiiiice(-ish) automobile does NOT mean that YOU OWN THE FUCKING ROAD!!! You CANNOT drive 55mph in the fast lane…on ANY freeway, ANYWHERE. It’s not cool. And to give the finger or tap on your breaks because the person ramming your asshole from the back is NOT pleased with your Sunday cruise at 7:45AM on a TUESDAY is also a douche move.

How about you take the fucking high road, change lanes to the “slower” one and let a shit ton of people who actually have places to go or at least a lower stress threshold pass you by before it comes to fist-to-cuffs and you’re being arrested for an act you are sure was caused by the other driver.

How about pedestrians and cross walks? In Berkeley there are ONE MILLION crosswalks in-between each stop light, with not one but TWO separate crosswalks on each corner, so god forbid, the pedestrian should cross a side street to make it to the large, across-9-lanes-of-traffic, crosswalk, AND THEN CROSS.

Then they step out into oncoming traffic. And don’t look. Not once. I mean seriously people, I HAVE A MACHINE THAT CAN KILL YOU EASILY!!!! ARE YOU MENTAL!?!?? HOW CAN YOU NOT MAKE EYE CONTACT??? My mom used to tell me, just because you have the right away that doesn’t do a lot for you if you’re dead…Fact. And then after they cross, head down, texting furiously, they walk away.


Here I may differ from the masses, but I expect….no, no, I DEMAND that I get a courteous wave. Seriously, I wave for every fucking thing I can when I’m on the roads, either as a walker or a driver. Why not? It can’t take more than 1 second to extend your arm and wiggle your fingers, even if you don’t make eye contact. It’s nooooothing….and yet, NO ONE DOES IT.

No one.

And then I feel like I’m going to blow a brain plug at that exact moment, and drive over them immediately because I’d rather have a dead human than an inconsiderate fool running our streets.

Sometimes I really hate people.

But now suddenly, there’s yet another level to this insanity called “I’m in my own world and don’t give a shit about you” which is with walkers…cutting off walkers. And here is where I have to be ohhhh soooo delicate.

So it seems that I must have recently lost a SHIT ton of weight so that I’m practically invisible because people seem not to see me. And in my camouflage of incredible skinniness, people with their heads down looking at their phones or eyes to the sky step in front of me like THEY NEVER SAW ME COMING. It’s up to me to veer out of THEIR WAY and usually into someone ELSE’S WAY, to which I have to apologize, say excuse me, and embarrassingly move on. But does the person who caused this mishap ever once know that they have made the Walking Dead a real life issue? Do they have ANY clue that they are being hazardous to the lives and MENTAL sanity of those around them???

For example, I was walking out of my cubicle the other day and a woman in a different department cut right in front of me causing me stop short or crash into her. And then she kept walking. So I stayed where I was, in SHOCK that she not only cut me off, didn’t look at me, and then didn’t say anything to recognize that it had happened. Finally she uses her 1 sense to realize that something is amiss, looks over to me and asks, “Do you need something?”….um, yah bitch, I need you to LOOK WHERE YOU’RE GOING.

I know, I know, I KNOW this is stupid. But people, it drives me bananas. I don’t know if it’s people being oblivious, rude, inconsiderate, mannerless, or they just truly expect everyone to act like them and get over it.

But I can’t act like that. I was raised by an older gentleman of a Father and a Southern Mother. WE SAY EXCUSE ME IN MY FAMILY. WE WAVE AT DRIVERS FOR STOPPING AT CROSSWALKS FOR US. WE WAVE IN CARS TO OUR LANES. WE ARE THE NICE ONES…but we do curse like a ship of sailors…

So…maybe just wave, say excuse me, be the bigger, nicer person as much as you can. Pass it forward. Maybe we can evolve…maybe…


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